Parenting Tips from a Survivor—Part 15

By Chuck Gartman

Posted December 16, 2005

No one wants their teenagers to turn out badly. We want them to be spiritually healthy as well as physically healthy. The trouble is that this does not happen automatically. It does require effort and discipline on our parts as Christian parents. Another factor that plagues most of us, too, is that even when we do all the right things sometimes our children choose the wrong kind of friends and they make wrong choices. Although it is not always easy to do, we still must trust that God in His infinite wisdom will take our efforts and bring them to fruition in our youth. I have often repeated Proverbs 22:6. Since I have girls I substitute “she” for “he” so that it will make more sense to me. “Train a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not turn from it.” (NIV) This has been a source of hope and strength for me as I have had to cope with some of the choices my children have made.

Several years ago the Family Ministry Department of the Baptist Sunday School Board (now LifeWay Christian Resources) published a short brochure on helping moms and dads to do a better job of parenting. It was called “Steps to Better Parenting.” Some of the information contained in that brochure bears repeating for us who are trying to survive rearing teens in the 21 st century. For this month and next we will focus on these steps.

Here are a few steps that can be helpful to us in our efforts to rear healthy spiritual children. Please do not interpret these as a formula because they are not. They are merely suggestions that have worked.

1. We must acknowledge that our children come from God. They are a gift to us. Since they are His and are simply on loan to us, ultimately He will be responsible for how they turn out. We are partners in the process, but He is still in charge.

2. Commit to rearing your child in “nurture and admonition of the Lord.” In the Old Testament Hannah dedicated Samuel to the Lord. She did this before he was even born, so that commitment ran through all that she did for and with Samuel. That idea may be worth considering as we attempt to give our children back to the One who gave them to us in the first place.

3. Our commitment to be faithful, committed Christians speaks volumes to our child and to those with whom we come in contact. Hoping that our children will turn into Godly men and women when we refuse to do the same is simply not realistic.

More next month. Thanks for your faithful readership.